Man Leaves Wife and 3 Kids Homeless, Her Sister Refuses to Help Because She Doesn’t Want to Raise a Family of 4

Author image for Sienna Varady
Sienna Varady
May 10, 2024 8:00 AM EDT

Family comes first at all times. If, however, your sister tried to take advantage of you just because it suits her, how would you respond? Would you quietly give in to her ridiculous demands for the sake of her three defenseless children, or would you stand your ground?

This is the story of a perplexed sister. After a contentious divorce, the older sister of the original poster (OP) desired to live with her and her spouse until she could afford to start anew. OP and her spouse eventually agreed, after much thought, that it would be preferable to turn down her request and instead offer to assist the sister in finding work so she may support herself and pay off her debts. But instead of accepting nearly any kind of assistance, OP's sister decided to publicly humiliate her in front of her friends, family, and the entire internet community.

With that in mind, be sure to read the story below if you're interested in learning the specifics of what happened and how OP dealt with her challenging sister! After you're done, don't forget to read the story of the stay-at-home mom's husband who refuses to help her, stating that housework is her responsibility!

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  • 01
    I 25F am an electrician. I started my apprenticeship at 17 and was hired immediately by my sponsor after I received my license. The reason I chose a trade was that I grew up in a trailer with my mom and sister, and I have wanted to own a house since I can remember, and being in the trades gave me access to a stable job and access to more money sooner. My partner, 29F, Thea, is a plumber, and we have scrounged and saved. In the end we bought land and built a tiny house in the uptown area of our c
    via canva
  • 02
    AITA for not letting my sister and her kids live in my house?
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 03
    I 25F am an electrician. I started my apprenticeship at 17 and was hired immediately by my sponsor after I received my license. The reason I chose a trade was that I grew up in a trailer with my mom and sister, and I have wanted to own a house since I can remember, and being in the trades gave me access to a stable job and access to more money sooner. My partner, 29F, Thea, is a plumber, and we have scrounged and saved. In the end we bought land and built a tiny house in the uptown area of our c
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 04
    one of the bedrooms is our reptile room, as I keep snakes and Thea keeps bearded dragons. We are child-free and happy in our home. My Sister "Lucy" 34F, is a waitress and has three kids (M4, M3, M2). Her husband just left her for a woman my age and she is left without his income to raise all three kids on her own. Her husband bought out her half of the house during the divorce and that left her and the kids living with my mom in the trailer.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 05
    I can admit I didn't grow up in the safest of areas and was carrying a knife when I was a teenager because of the danger. Because of the safety issue, Lucy came to Thea and I and begged us to let her and her sons move in. She said we would have to get rid of our reptiles or keep them in our room, her sons could have the other bedroom, and she would sleep in our kitchen on an air mattress. She said nothing about paying us rent or helping around the house.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 06
    I told her no, because two toddlers and a little kid who is about to start kindergarten aren't suitable to be in our home and we don't want too many people in our house. She said that we live in a better part of town with better schools and that she needed the help. I told her we didn't have the room and that I was sorry, but I could hook her up with some journeymen I know and she could get started on an apprenticeship that pays better than her current job if she needed extra money.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 07
    She called my job and Thea's job "Dirty blue collar trash" and left our home. She posted about how we wouldn't let her stay online, and now my relatives are messaging me about, "How could I let a single mother and 3 kids be homeless," How "they're your bl d," and "You owe your sister better than that." I feel like a complete a le even though Thea told me I have every right not to want them in our house. AITA?
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 08
    AFTER DINNER WITH MY XBIL EDIT: Thea and I went to dinner with my XBIL tonight. He brought his laptop and showed us all of the documentation. 1.) Lucy used her proceeds from the house to pay for her attorney, even though my XBIL offered to pay (timestamped e-mails to prove it) 2.) The woman living with him is his niece, not his AP, as Lucy claimed. (She came to the meeting; they have pictures and phone records showing that
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 09
    she is my XBIL's older sister's daughter.) 3.) LUCY CHEATED: ALL 3 BOYS AREN'T HIS. And DNA tests show that they all have different dads. So Lucy has been having multiple affairs. 4.) The 300 he is sending each month is a good will payment for allowing him to be a dad for a few years. 5.) Lucy isn't waitressing, she is working for Amway and another company called Sentsy in direct sales.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 10
    6.) Lucy won't do an apprenticeship because it doesn't fall under traditional gender roles (posts on a second social media account) 7.) Lucy has made bic posts on social media about me and my wife, and blocked us so we didn't see them. In the end... IDK what to think.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 11
    Ok_Play2364 · 17 hr. ago If your sister's ex, bought her out of their house, WHAT did she do with that money? She should have gotten an apartment
    via u/Ok_Play2364
  • 12
    ElectricThrowRA OP 16 hr. ago • I have no clue what she did with it. I didn't ask because moneytalk is a sore spot for both of us.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 13
    MyDarlingArmadillo 16 hr. ago . edited 14 hr. ago Partassipant [1] She's had money from the house and apparently doesn't need a better paid job if she's rejected a very good offer of the apprenticeship. She's obviously done a bit of homework if she's thinking about your local schools, which the eldest won't need for a while yet assuming they start at 5.
    via u/MyDarlingArmadillo
  • 14
    It sounds like she just wants to mooch, possibly with you and your partner as babysitters, rather than sort herself out. Nta. So presumptuous of her to tell you to move your pets out and she'll have your living room. Edited to correct school age typo!
    via u/MyDarlingArmadillo
  • 15
    Fooftato · 17 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [26] NTA. You should be so PROUD of the GREAT life and the great job you have with Thea and your pets! Seriously good for you and I'm not saying this at all in a condescending way I am genuinely cheering you on. It wasn't an ah move of her to ask but it sure was of her to insult your very respectable careers and ask you to get rid of your lovely pets. Very r de.
    via u/Fooftato
  • 16
    She could have a respectable trade making a good deal of money but she threw that in your face and insulted you? NTA! Also if her husband bought her out why isn't she having a tiny house built?
    via u/Fooftato
  • 17
    ElectricThrowRA OP. 16 hr. ago I did ask her that and told her I'd do all of the installation work for free and Thea offered to do her plumbing for free as well, and she turned us down. She also doesn't think our house is satisfying and told us she wished we got a mortgage and bought a bigger one instead of building. It was an entire argument back when we bought materials and built it and she and her ex were still married.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 18
    KronkLaSworda · 17 hr. ago • Sultan of Sphincter [909] NTA While she's not an AH for asking, she is an AH for blasting you online. I'd probably just block any family that hassles you over this. You made your decisions in life, and she chose to have 3 kids while working as
    via u/KronkLaSworda
  • 19
    a waitress. It's not your fault she's playing the game of life on hard mode. "How could I let a single mother and 3 kids be homeless," Sounds like they are volunteering to take her in. She should reach out to them. /s
    via u/KronkLaSworda
  • 20
    BeMandalorTomad 17 hr. ago "I need you to get rid of your pets so my kids and I can mooch off of you" is basically what your sister said to you. You made a great life for yourself. You should be so proud :) it's a shame your sister is in this situation but she has no right to make demands on you. NTA.
    via u/BeMandalorTomad
  • 21
    StudentParty2666 16 hr. ago NTA. "Can I add four people to your household?" is a yes or no question. The answer was no with a solid suggestion for help. The end. How on earth did the ex husband end up with the house and leave his kids homeless? He's the one who needs to step up.
    via u/StudentParty2666
  • 22
    ElectricThrowRA OP. 16 hr. ago Because she agreed to take them and he didn't want kids, I suspect, but do not know, that she stealthed him. Poking holes in the condoms, because I also suspect he had been wanting to leave her for a year before they had their first kid.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA
  • 23
    PrscheWdow. 15 hr. ago Partassipant [3] NTA. I don't know how large your home is in terms of area, but 6 people and 1 bathroom? No way. It was your sister's responsibility to secure safe housing for her kids and herself, her failure to do so is her problem, not yours.
    via u/PrscheWdow
  • 24
    Oh, and for the record, being an electrician or plumber isn't "blue collar trash." Both trades can make serious bank, which is why you and your partner are able to own your own land and home.
    via u/PrscheWdow
  • 25
    ElectricThrowRA OP 14 hr. ago • 4 rooms and two storeys. Bottom floor has our bedroom and the kitchen. Our bedroom fits 2 small closets and our bed, the kitchen is just an oven, a sink and countertops, the stairs are inside the kitchen and lead to the small hallway with the snake room and the bathroom. It's about 380 square feet all things considered.
    via u/ElectricThrowRA

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Modern Family relationship advice family drama marriage brother sibling rivalry siblings relationship-drama askreddit family feud relationships divorce entitled sister children entitled people
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